I am always a little surprised when I see children wearing shoes at home, whether on television or in person. It surprises me because when I was a child, my parents expected me to remove my shoes at the door. When I visited my friends' homes, their parents often expected me to take my shoes off. So it always seems a little strange when I see children keeping their shoes on at home.
The practise of removing shoes was expected until I reached the age of about 12. My parents became less stringent about it as I got older. Occasionally this house rule would be revived in later years. It was restored when I was 21 when my parents and I moved to a house with cream carpets, though they were not consistent in keeping to it.
There are some homes, in the UK, where the hosts will expect the children of guests to remove their shoes, but would not expect it of adult guests. Some guests will insist that their children remove their shoes without removing their own. I can understand why some people may be more concerned about children's shoes; children do tend to be less careful about what they step in and are more likely to run around in long and wet grass. However, adults should never forget that their own shoes pick up an awful lot of less noticeable dirt. There is also the fact that children learn to follow rules better when adults act consistently. There is a certain amount of 'do as I say, not do as I do' in the requirement of shoes-off for children only.
Many childcare experts are of the opinion that children should wear shoes to the minimum necessary and therefore recommend shoes-off indoors for health reasons.
More than feet touch the floor
A couple of months ago I invited some friends over for dinner. There was still a lot of snow on the ground from a significant snowfall we had a few days earlier. Shoes came off at the door out of courtesy and habit. We ate dinner at the kitchen table (alas! I have no dining room in my apartment) and then adjourned to the living room for a little social time. We watched a movie together and then one friend and I decided to play on the X-box for a little while. We sat on the floor to do that. I remember thinking how embarrassing it was to have a guest sitting on my dirty carpet. The shoes may have been off then, but they had not always been in the past, and the carpet shows it. I doubt that my friend really thought about it, but it was not a pleasant thought for me. If feet were the only thing that ever touched the floor, dirty carpets might not bother me so much, but they aren't. When one sits on the floor, hands end up on the floor, too. Dirt from the floor can come off on clothes as well. I will now ask my guests to remove their shoes for the sake of my guests who sit on the floor. It will help me be a hostess with a good conscience.
The Decline of the Dinner Party
It seems the popularity of the dinner party is declining. The British golden age of dinner parties in the Seventies is long gone. No more are the evenings of Prawn and Avocado cocktails and Bonoffi pies.
The reasons for the decline are obvious. With women working longer hours than ever before, it is not easy for them to put together an elaborate and impressive feast.
There is increasingly an ever-expanding range of restaurants in which to dine. Why cook for your friends when you can take them with you to a restaurant?
I think the middle-class aspirational culture behind the dinner party has changed quite a lot as well.
The decline of the dinner party is unsurprising, but it is rather sad. I do suspect, however, that it may lead to more people adopting the shoes-off rule in their homes.
A family who regularly entertain guests might feel under social obligation to accept lots of shoes trampling their home. However, with the more contemporary culture of entertaining being done in restaurants, it is likely that the home will become a more sacred domestic sphere. Those who go out to have their social life may be more inclined to be jealous for the cleanliness of their home when they are there. They may well expect the guests that they do welcome to remove their shoes.
I do hope so anyway.
The reasons for the decline are obvious. With women working longer hours than ever before, it is not easy for them to put together an elaborate and impressive feast.
There is increasingly an ever-expanding range of restaurants in which to dine. Why cook for your friends when you can take them with you to a restaurant?
I think the middle-class aspirational culture behind the dinner party has changed quite a lot as well.
The decline of the dinner party is unsurprising, but it is rather sad. I do suspect, however, that it may lead to more people adopting the shoes-off rule in their homes.
A family who regularly entertain guests might feel under social obligation to accept lots of shoes trampling their home. However, with the more contemporary culture of entertaining being done in restaurants, it is likely that the home will become a more sacred domestic sphere. Those who go out to have their social life may be more inclined to be jealous for the cleanliness of their home when they are there. They may well expect the guests that they do welcome to remove their shoes.
I do hope so anyway.
Feet That Only a Sandal Could Love!
And even with that, I think it would be hard. What kind of foot fashion sense got into them? I just know that I do not want to look like this!
Is this the "new" trend for spring? I swear I have never seen anyone with toes that looked like those in a pair of sandals.
What I do is kick them in the pants with a diamond buckled shoe!
~~Aileen Mehle~~
This Week's NATIONAL ETIQUETTE AWARD goes to.... Romania!
Romania - Wikipedia
Romania - World Factbook
Romanian News (Bucharest Daily News)
Centuries ago the Roman Empire granted land to nobles in what came to be known as Romania, a country of Latin people in the middle of the Slavic world. Romanians claim that their language is closer to the Latin of the Empire than any other Romance language spoken today.
Romania is a beautiful, lush, mountainous country. Driving through the Carpathian Mountains or Transylvanian Alps in the summer is breathtaking and affords a wonderful view of quaint Alpine houses resting on a carpet of wildflowers. People living in small mountain villages often own cows that they send out in the morning to graze where they choose. In the evening the sound of cow bells signals that the cows have come home. Romania still maintains a very large rural population and some of the mountain villages are populated by Gypsies.
After World War II, Romania was under the control of the USSR. It became and remained a Communist state until December 1989. The Communist government under Nicolae Ceausescu successfully impoverished the Romanian people and hindered industrialization. It also contributed to a disturbingly large population of orphaned and abandoned children who live in underfunded orphanages or on the streets. The government actively persecuted Christians who did not follow the state-controlled Romanian Orthodox Church. Even within the state church there were many persecuted for dissent. Today over 86% of Romanians officially belong to the Romanian Orthodox Church, which effectively serves as a hindrance to the growth of Evangelical churches. Ceausescu set up an improved system of education, so the Romanian people have a very high literacy rate, but that seems to be one of the only positive contributions made by the regime. Romania is making slow progress, but the poverty rate is still very high and the government is still very bureaucratic and highly susceptible to corruption.
Romania has some very lovely historical buildings for tourists to visit. In Transylvania one can visit Bran Castle, the castle Bram Stoker used as the basis for Dracula's castle. In Sinaia, in northern Wallachia, King Carol I's Peles Castle is open to tourists. Visitors are welcome to use the public restroom - a Turkish toilet - and they will kindly provide you with a very small amount of toilet paper for a fee. Inside the Peles Castle all visitors must wear felt slippers over their shoes to protect the hardwood floors and beautiful rugs. Both castles provide opportunity to purchase lovely handmade table cloths, runners and doilies and other local handicrafts from merchants. They will initially ask for much more than the merchandise is worth, so it also provides a great opportunity for improving one's haggling skills.
Although accustomed to poverty, the Romanian people are some of the most hospitable people I have ever met. What little they have is gladly offered to their guests. Romanian food is very good, too. (I was pleased to discover that they sell the same Fanta formula in Romania as they do in the Middle East. The European/Middle Eastern Fanta is far superior to the overly sweet and syrupy stuff bottled under the same name in the United States.) Experts in hospitality, Romanian hosts in Romania or abroad will not hesitate to ask you to kindly take your shoes off at the door, please.
Romania - World Factbook
Romanian News (Bucharest Daily News)
Centuries ago the Roman Empire granted land to nobles in what came to be known as Romania, a country of Latin people in the middle of the Slavic world. Romanians claim that their language is closer to the Latin of the Empire than any other Romance language spoken today.
Romania is a beautiful, lush, mountainous country. Driving through the Carpathian Mountains or Transylvanian Alps in the summer is breathtaking and affords a wonderful view of quaint Alpine houses resting on a carpet of wildflowers. People living in small mountain villages often own cows that they send out in the morning to graze where they choose. In the evening the sound of cow bells signals that the cows have come home. Romania still maintains a very large rural population and some of the mountain villages are populated by Gypsies.
After World War II, Romania was under the control of the USSR. It became and remained a Communist state until December 1989. The Communist government under Nicolae Ceausescu successfully impoverished the Romanian people and hindered industrialization. It also contributed to a disturbingly large population of orphaned and abandoned children who live in underfunded orphanages or on the streets. The government actively persecuted Christians who did not follow the state-controlled Romanian Orthodox Church. Even within the state church there were many persecuted for dissent. Today over 86% of Romanians officially belong to the Romanian Orthodox Church, which effectively serves as a hindrance to the growth of Evangelical churches. Ceausescu set up an improved system of education, so the Romanian people have a very high literacy rate, but that seems to be one of the only positive contributions made by the regime. Romania is making slow progress, but the poverty rate is still very high and the government is still very bureaucratic and highly susceptible to corruption.
Romania has some very lovely historical buildings for tourists to visit. In Transylvania one can visit Bran Castle, the castle Bram Stoker used as the basis for Dracula's castle. In Sinaia, in northern Wallachia, King Carol I's Peles Castle is open to tourists. Visitors are welcome to use the public restroom - a Turkish toilet - and they will kindly provide you with a very small amount of toilet paper for a fee. Inside the Peles Castle all visitors must wear felt slippers over their shoes to protect the hardwood floors and beautiful rugs. Both castles provide opportunity to purchase lovely handmade table cloths, runners and doilies and other local handicrafts from merchants. They will initially ask for much more than the merchandise is worth, so it also provides a great opportunity for improving one's haggling skills.
Although accustomed to poverty, the Romanian people are some of the most hospitable people I have ever met. What little they have is gladly offered to their guests. Romanian food is very good, too. (I was pleased to discover that they sell the same Fanta formula in Romania as they do in the Middle East. The European/Middle Eastern Fanta is far superior to the overly sweet and syrupy stuff bottled under the same name in the United States.) Experts in hospitality, Romanian hosts in Romania or abroad will not hesitate to ask you to kindly take your shoes off at the door, please.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
