My pup Pacey was acting her normal rambunctious self today when she decided to play doctor on her latest fluffy chew toy (i.e., victim), redman, and remove his squeaker. The life cycle of a toy around these parts is about five minutes, so I decided to break out the ole sewing kit and restuff the redman, squeaker and all. This surgery was being done on my lap and poor Pacey couldn't stand to be away from her new BFF for even a second, so she was making grabs for the redman. And here I am, at the end of a long day of work and pricking myself on the finger relentlessly, so without even thinking much about it, I smacked her on the head one.
Though all Pacey did was sit there and stare at me with a look that almost read as "is
that all you've got?", I couldn't help instantly feeling the guilt build up. I shouldn't take my frustration out at a dog, I was messing with her toy within her line of sight, blah, blah, blah. And the point of this post isn't really even about a dog,
because not five minutes after redman was fixed did I find him in the bedroom missing an arm and hemorrhaging stuffing - but it got me thinking:
if and when I become a parent, is striking out going to be my first reaction to my kid?(This isn't a post that tells the world that I've changed my mind and I am suddenly ready and open to having children. No, ma' am ... But as most any woman of child-bearing age does wonder from time to time, what kind of parent would I be?)
BF is convinced I am going to be a big softie because I treat the pup like a baby. I feel completely different because he seems to forget I was raised from immigrant asian parents (see the nods of understanding from my asian sisters out there) - meaning schoolwork above all else, helping around the house is not a request, if you can take the bus by yourself that means you're old enough to have a job, and disciplining offspring does not mean taking away their iPhone for 30 minutes.
I am pretty sure I am going to be the hated parent, as I've already made rules for the
imaginary child in my head. Such as if you're going to whine about wanting to stay in the store, I will leave you there. I am not a short order cook, so if you don't like what I make, then you're going to go hungry. You don't have to eat everything off your plate, but you better at least
try everything. You don't get negotiating power until you're making your own money. When I say "now," I don't mean "later." You get the point.
I guess I really won't know for sure until it happens, huh. I may freak my current-self out and become a total child-cooer. So what about you? For you gals out there with no kids, what kind of parent do you think you'll be? For the mothers out there, are you the parent you thought you would be (hope I didn't just ask a loaded question)?
Sweater: J. Crew featherweight (worn
here before - similar 3/4
here)
Belt: Anthropologie looping lanes (worn
here before - similar
here)
Tights: Target
